Well today, I give autism the middle finger. Yep, I sure do. You see, autism has a way of creeping into your day and turning it upside down, without notice. Autism is a sneaky turd!
My day started like any other. Coffee, facebook, peace and quiet. Liam was up super late, so he was in bed later than usual. Yay me!!! Finally I heard him yelling for me. No "good morning momma," but "MOMMMMMAAAAA I NEEEEEDDDD YYYYOOOOUUUUU!!!!" Ugh! What could it be????
It was nothing. Nope, nothing at all. It was a waste of walking into his room just to hear him say, "momma. I don't want to do school today." Well! I don't want to wash your laundry, do your dishes, clean up your messes, and so on! (Of course this is what I was thinking.) What I said was, "I'm sorry buddy, but it's Wednesday, a school day. Now let's go and get it done, it's gorgeous outside!"
What followed was hell. Pure hell! I literally was waiting for him to puke pea soup on me, and to see his head spin around on his shoulders.
Instead he tore through the house screaming at the top of his lungs, "NO SCHOOL!!! I WANT HARRY POTTER!!! YOU SAID I COULD WATCH HARRY POTTER TODAY. I WANT HARRY POTTER!!" Yep, I said that, guilty as charged, but I told him last nite, he could watch it today AFTER school. When I told him this he got more angry. He grabbed the movie, I took it from him. He went into his father's room (where I put it on the highest shelf (I could barely reach it), and proceeded to scream in there. When hubs held out his hand for Liam to come over and attempt to calm him, Liam hauled off and slapped him, not once, twice. Wow! Someone was feeling brave! He then tore out into the entryway, grabbed a flip flop and took off. I knew what he was thinking. He was gonna go throw it at his dad. I took it. He threw himself on the floor, smashing his head. He didn't notice. He got up and just started running through the house screaming, grabbing whatever he saw and throwing it. Now, I normally tell him to calm down, and let him kind of wind down, but this was the worst meltdown he has had in a few weeks. So instead, I finally got a hold of him. Now this is where momma got brave....
I got him to sit on the floor, in a calm voice I just said, "let's sit, we will rock." He did, so I managed to get my legs over his, and cradle him in my arms, and I started to rock him. For about 10 seconds he went with it. I thought, "oh thank God, it's gonna work." Boy was I WRONG!!!! Next thing I knew I had teeth laying into my arm!!!!! You guessed it, he bit me that lil booger!!!!!! Then he started to arch his back and I let his legs loose, and then the kicking started. For my own safety and his, I backed away. I let him lay there and kick and scream and in a few moments, he stopped. He got in the rocker, and finished rocking his melt down away.
yep, still hurts :/
He stayed like that for about 30 minutes, just rocking, staring into space. Almost as if in a trance. Then, out of now where, "Momma, can we do school now?" Ummm, yeah buddy! We were able to get his 3 core subjects done. He had a phonics test, scored a 94% and only got angry over it once. (he hates tests!) So I let him skip history and instead of their art lesson, we did a sensory craft.
As I write this, he is with his daddy. They went to the campground to pick up his wooden snakes. (That was another day, another meltdown~ when Josie ate the ones he had. Thankfully, the owners of the campground are so nice, they went to another campground, and picked him up some more.) Hubs took the camera, and they are gonna take some pics of the fall colors while they are gone. As for me, I am enjoying this peace and quiet. I would love to nap, but I hear the laundry calling my name......
I just wanted to share this moment, to let you all know, you are not alone. Autism sneaks up on us all every now and then, knocking us to the ground. Our job is to get back up, and not let it win!!!!
<3<3<3<3
Oh Courtney,
ReplyDeleteI feel for you because I know exactly what you are going through. As I read your horrific account, visions of James and homework appeared before my eyes. That is what happens everyday at homework! Only James doesn't bite, he headbutts with that gargantuan head of his!! He snaps out of it as fast also, and I have to be willing to forget the hours of screaming etc and calmly say, "yes buddy, we can do homework now."
yes, it is sometimes hard to just let it go and move on, knowing they have no control over their emotions....ty, bc it's nice not to feel alone :)
DeleteYEP we went to the park the other day and just getting peanut to turn around and come home sparked it ! out of know where ( although we know he hates turning around on himself and heading back the way we came its his major fritz) Today we are attempting to walk his brother to daycare as peanut is on school holidays. he hates this walk and we will have to turn around and come back. he also hates daycare. It is drizzling/ but we got to do it deep breath and just go ! wish us luck
ReplyDeleteoh no, I wish you both luck!!! Hang in there momma <3
DeleteI am so glad I found your blog. My son has Asperger's. We only got a diagnosis last year. He is 10. For years we swung between thinking it was 'all in our heads' and 'we need help'. Although he is considered high functioning, we still need help in learning to help him and cope with his quirks for ourselves. There is not much the professionals can help us with anymore (not that they did too much - was a bit underwhelming). We've been left on our own really. Thank you for your honesty here. Already I have learnt a thing or three :)
ReplyDeleteThank you Lizzy, and welcome! Glad you found me :) My son is 6, and he at times gets no help. He has been waiting on a TSS and MT worker for months now. It amazes me how they don't have a problem spending money on finding out how many kds have asd, but they don't bother to spend money to fund agencies to hire more workers to help our kiddos. I thing I have learned is you always have to fight for your child's care, and never back down :) I am glad you have learned some things from me, it makes my venting worth that much more <3 :)
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